One drunken night a long, long time ago……..
Haha, well that’s how it started. Mark and I had both been engaged before and to be honest I don’t think either of us had seriously considered marriage properly. Well, he hadn’t and I had gone through the motions with my ex but never seriously considered it or committed to the idea.
Mark and I had the conversation when we first started seeing each other and discussed that marriage was a waste of time.
That however quickly changed, he started to talk about that if he ever was to do it then he would not want to have a massively formal affair, he wanted a big party and if he was ever to do it he would want a registry office and not a church. Now in my mind that was a lot of “ifs”.
I warmed to the idea and actually wanted to spend the rest of my life with this man. Making it official sounded like a possibility. I like the idea of a wedding late in the day, I would have liked a church but a registry office was more than acceptable because that meant we could do it the way we wanted, a party reception that was aimed at everyone, no formalities, fun for the kids and most importantly of all, I wanted it to be perfect with as little cost implication as possible.
I wont bore you with the background story, but if you are new to reading my blog or haven’t read that bit yet, here it is….Hubby and I…
After our engagement party I started to plan. I put pen to paper and started writing lists and making notes. Working out how much we had to spend and what we wanted.
The date was set in February 2011 for April 2012, as you know however having read our story, we had to change that date. It was April and we changed the date for the December. (Hubby and I)
Mission “Panic” Planning commenced!!
Our budget was £2000.
Now that’s not a lot, not a lot at all in the grand scheme of weddings but here is how we did it……
It was always going to be a family party, heavily involving the kids. The reception I had planned was aimed at resolving any boredom they may face.
We arrived at the club for the reception and the kids went to find there seats and goody bags. It meant they could fill their faces while the adults got comfortable, mingled and got themselves a drink.
We did the speeches first. When everybody was there a glass was tapped and we sat down for the speeches (all along the kids still munching their way through goody bags).
Now in hindsight sweets and cake before the buffet maybe wasn’t the best idea, but it was a party so that’s allowed, right?
The buffet opened and everybody tucked in. Adults talked and the entertainer came out with balloon animals and dancing games for the kids, while the adults got on with their thing.
It worked…that is my point. The younger ones started to disperse about 8pm. We then had adult time with the older kids.
Anyway on with my costings 🙂
|Invitations & Place Cards||£75.00|
|Wedding Party Gifts||£50.00|
|Favours & Kids Goody Bags||£60.00|
Some of those things look a little hard to believe and yes, we came in over budget, but when all came to all we didn’t andhere is why:
The best suggestion I had made was would I like for people to pay for wedding items as a gift to us for our wedding. Genius idea. My Uncle and Aunt were the ones to suggest it. At the end of the day we had a home, we didn’t need anything and we said if people wanted to gift us, then money would be amazing, maybe for a holiday.
They came forward and said they would love to buy us our Wedding Cake as a wedding gift. We obviously jumped at the chance, it was an amazingly generous gift, very special and personal.
At the same time my Mum, My Dad and his partner and one of my other Aunts all stepped forward and said they would like to do the same.
Moral to the story is, if you have someone who can make and do, and has a hobby or interest you can use or someone who you aren’t afraid to suggest it too help, ask away. It will save them the hassle of having to think of a gift and they will be over the moon to know they have played a huge part in your day.
This was a cost we couldn’t get down, we wanted to get married on a Saturday and we wanted to have a prime time of day. So we paid the premium for that.
However, if you are reading this and you are prepared to marry on a week day or a Sunday, there is a strong chance that you will be able to get this a lot cheaper.
It is certainly cheaper to get married in the actual registry office than getting a registrar to attend a venue for you.
£5.00?? Yes indeedy £5.00. How? I here you shout…well…
There is a lot to be said for your local Working Mens Club. It may not be your ideal, tranquil posh hotel but for our purposes it was perfect. The concert hall was massive, the décor was dated but we could work with it. For £5.00 I wasn’t going to complain. We had to join as members and that was the £5.00 charge.
We had the run of the place, we would have to set up and arrange the tables but in the grand scheme of things that was nothing.
Invitations and Place cards
These proved to be a bit of a nightmare and cost me more than they should have. I had ordered them for the original date and then had to reorder for the new date. However, I wanted simple and they were of postcard size with a decoupage balloon on, in my wedding colours, Ebay is an amazing source for saving money on wedding items. They came, handmade, at such a reasonable cost. They were very pretty.
I was adamant that I wasn’t having place settings. However as time went on and people started with the “you don’t wanna sit such and such with that one”, I was talked in to doing one.
One Sunday morning turned in to one Sunday afternoon, that turned into tears, screaming and giving up on life.
But finally after 6 hours of jiggling, moving and shouting at Mark for his lack if interest in the whole thing it was done.
The cards came from the lady who had made the invitations and I decorated them with diamontes that I bought cheaply on eBay. So that we could identify who needed a goody bag and no champagne flute I put a ladybird on the kids ones.
One word…..CHINA…..we all dream of an amazing dress.
I spent weeks hunting for the “right” dress. I went to all the shops in Darlington, Durham, and ended up in Chester le Street. I still didn’t find one that I could class as the one. I had an idea of what I wanted and searched the net.
Finally I found one that was similar to one that I had tried on and liked when I went shopping with my Mum.
Now the dresses from China are not exactly the same. However, if you find the right maker they will do their best for you.
It is important to check like you do on Ebay, seller ratings, quality and feedback but this extra work will save you a fortune.
The site I used was www.dhgate.com. I found the dress I wanted mine based on and sent one of the makers a message. I could have it in any colour I wanted and measured to my exact measurements.
It came out at cost of £140.00 as I needed a plus size dress.
This was bought for me, so I saved here.
It took four weeks and arrived in a very small parcel but on opening they quality was fantastic. The fabric was a very heavy satin (as I would have imagined it to be), the beading was all done by hand and there was plenty of fabric should I have needed it taking in or out. Only issue was that it was a little too long but nothing an extra inch on my shoes couldn’t fix.
My shoes came from Ebay at a cost of £20.00.
You guessed it…Ebay. The minute we had our date in place I started to watch for dresses on Ebay. I knew I wanted two black adult gowns and three little people dresses. I wasn’t bothered if they weren’t the same, just similar in style. The same with the little ones dresses I wanted them to be the same colour. I was more concerned that the bridesmaids had a dress to suit their personality rather than them all match.
Post Prom season is a prime time to pick up a bargain. I got three adult dresses, black, for the grand total of £10. They were all Debenhams dresses that had been worn once but were in perfect condition.
The little girls dresses cam in a brand total of £20.00. I had one in mind for Libby, and managed to get it for £10.00. The other two dresses came in at £1.50 each. One Debenhams dress and two BHS dresses. The rest of the £30.00 went on shrugs for the little ones.
The adult bridesmaids wanted to get their own shoes and the little peoples ballet pumps came from Primark in the summer sale for £3 each.
Groom and Boys Outfits
We had Mark to buy for, his best man, one usher and three boys.
They all wanted to be the same.
I had bought Mark and his brother trousers from Jacamo, as the only thing we could agree on was black bottoms. Now I say this and really you need the back story on the colour scheme.
I am a Newcastle United fan, which reading earlier posts I am sure you have figured out by now. Mark however is a Liverpool fan. My dreams of a wedding scheme have always been Black and White. In fact I wanted a black dress but was told in no uncertain terms NO. So when I said I wanted to have our scheme as black and white, I was told not unless I can have red.
Colour scheme sorted.
I went ahead and bought the men red ties and that left me with the shirts to buy. In the meantime I had managed to get hold of the boys trousers (back to school trousers from ASDA), shoes (back to school), and had hunted down matching shirt and tie sets on Ebay that were from Debenhams. They were black shirts with a black and white checked ties.
When Mark saw these he was quite taken with them so I ordered them all black shirts (again from Jacamo) and checked ties from that place I used a lot (I bet they wish they were on commission the amount of times I have mentioned and am about to mention some more :D)
Sorted, they all sorted their own shoes.
One of the items that was bought for us as a gift.
My Dad’s partner was a florist by trade. We had a chat and because we were getting married in December it was going to be hard and expensive to source the flowers I wanted.
We visited a faux flower warehouse and I was overwhelmed by what choice there was out there. I chose what I wanted and they were bought and made up.
Hairdresser & Nails
This was somewhere I was prepared to pay the full price.
At the time I was sporting a bald head and a wig. I sourced a local hairdresser that could confidently work with wigs and she did an amazing job with putting it in to an “up do”.
She also put up Mark’s sisters hair (my big bridesmaid), my Mum’s hair and the two older bridesmaids hair.
I felt amazing although the wig lasted until the first dance and was place on the best mans head for safe keeping for the rest of the night.
My Nails were a gift to me from Mark’s Mum. She was learning how to do them at an evening class and offered to them as a gift to me.
Now each to their own, but I wasn’t that bothered about arriving in a big flash wedding car. Not my thing, we wanted understated and that’s the direction we went in.
Don’t get me wrong I did price the cars up but I wasn’t prepared to pay £800+ on three cars that we had the use of for a couple of hours.
I looked in to a few local taxi companies and did a few journeys with each. I picked one that had smartly presented drivers, the cars were spotless and they were nice looking cars.
We booked two 8 seaters (One for Mark and the boys and One for my Bridesmaids) and a car for me and my Mum. £130.00…sorted!
Wedding Party Gifts
I didn’t have the money to go over the top.
I wanted something simple.
Ebay again ….I bought the big bridesmaids a hand bag that matched their dresses.
The little bridesmaids a lovely little Bridesmaid necklace.
Marks and Spencer’s for an orchid each for my Mum and my Dads partner.
The men folk quite simply were gifted with beer. All gifts were warmly received.
So I am all for pretty but in this case I had to take in to consideration the venue. The ceilings are high and the room is big. I could have gone all chic but I decided that a simple option was balloons. On the table there would be a table cloth, petals, the toast glasses (the club did not have flutes, so we had to source these) and three bottles of Cava.
The balloons were sourced from a local company at a very reasonable charge. The petals, gloss paper table clothes, plates and cutlery all came from Ebay, at a small cost in comparison to high street prices.
The chair covers were owned by a friend of my Dad’s partner and the topiary trees were from her front doors. We added some organza and some £1 lights from the Poundshop.
Favours & Kids Goody Bags
You guessed it :D….I ordered red and black favour bags at a small cost, they were coming from China and arrived with in 14 days. For filling them I went to Tesco and bought their Value Mints. For 120 guests I bought 20 bags of mints and there was more than enough.
The cost of the favours was bumped up by the “Goody Bags” I did for the kids.
Having been to many weddings, I always feel for the parents with the kids that are clearly bored and create a scene for them during the lengthy Meet and Greet and Speech parts. So I thought a bag with some treats in would do the trick. In each bag (which I bought from The Card Factory in the Christmas offers they do) was a cupcake, a “fruit shoot” type drink, a selection of sweets, a bag of crisps and a couple of colouring pages and pencils. All relatively low in cost but it worked a treat.
Now any of my friends will tell you that I do not give the reigns of cooking over to anyone else very lightly. Especially when it comes to party food.
I was adamant that I wanted to make stuff and despite promising I would keep out…..I didn’t.
The buffet was paid for by both of my parents. We decided on a buffet as it fell in to the casual approach we wanted and again it meant that the children did not have to be pinned down and the same for adults.
My Dad’s partner called in favours and her friend made two lovely big poached Salmon, she made roast meats and they ordered in pies, quiches, cooked cold meats and Roast Potatoes from a local butchers.
I went to Iceland and spent £80 on their party foods and then when and bought stuff for sandwiches.
The night before my wedding I spent until 2am cooking, and truly was in my happy place, well that’s until the alarm went off at 6 am for my soon to be Mum in law to come and do my nails.
(This wasn’t all of it, there were boxes all along the seat at the back too)
The buffet as you can see was huge, and there was loads left over. (I am a firm believer in left overs, if there is food left over then people were full, an empty buffet means people may have gone away hungry and I can not be dealing with that on my conscience)
For me getting married was about making it a family affair. We wanted a big family party where children were made to feel as much part of the day as we were.
There are a lot of children between mine and Marks family and I believe on the day we had 26 children there.
I called around a few disco’s and children’s entertainers and found a guy who’s friend was a very popular children’s entertainer in the town we lived. He wasn’t booked on the date we wanted and said he would normally go to weddings etc. with his mate to help out with the disco. If we wanted him to keep the kids entertained for an hour or so then he would happily do it for a few pints. Deal!
So we had a disco and a kids entertainer for £120.00.
***Tip*** When sending emails to people for quotes always make sure to mention other things you are looking for, in our case in paid off several times over
Your local supermarket. That simple, they charge you a standard fee per glass. Half of that was refunded when I returned the glasses and any breakages were charged at £1 per broken glass. Simple, 120 flutes in the bag for £40. (You are asking how many breakages there were, the answer would be two)
There is always the option of plastic glasses that can be spruced up if you have the time. Here is an example of the ones I did for my Sister in Laws Wedding.
Trusty old supermarket again, we waited until one of the supermarkets had the “Buy 6 bottles and get 5% off” promotion offer on. Then went and bought 24 bottles. Three per table and three to hide under my table 😀 .
My Aunty and Uncle offered to buy this for us.
She asked me to find what I wanted and get in touch with our regular cake lady to make it for us.
I chose a Chocolate base, a victoria sponge middle and a lemon sponge on top.
Now the cake I chose was very specific and on the day it arrived with pink flowers instead of red, the cake lady was sent away promptly to go and fetch some food colouring(paint). It also wasnt as delicate as the photo I had shown her. Saying that it was a fabulous cake and very pretty, and tasted amazing.
I mentioned before that my other Aunt offered up her services as a Wedding Gift to us and that was the photographs.
She is a very keen photographer and her work is fantastic. (I have done a review of her daughters artwork E.Bulman)
Anyway, I didn’t want many formal pictures, the shots I wanted were natural, doing it this way meant that she could enjoy the day as much as the rest of us and just wander round with a camera to her hearts content.
The pictures were fantastic and came as a wedding gift.
So last but not least and almost forgotten as it was nearly forgotten when it happened…
A week before we got married I was going through a checklist to see that I had done and got everything we needed.
I got to the rings ticky box and thought…..ohhhhh ****.
Instantly I did a search on Ebay for Mark one that he liked, with the option of next day delivery. Sorted it came in at £59.99.
Mine, I would like to say was all singing and dancing, but I couldn’t bear the idea of wearing hundreds of pounds worth of jewels on a finger and decided to go with the £17.99 band from Argos.
It did the job and still does, I actually replaced it a few weeks after the wedding and hated the one I replaced it with so I took it back. The one I wear is the one that got given to me on that special day and that’s that.
So concludes my wedding on a budget.
I have since then done wedding favours for a few other people.
All the items, with the exception of the contents of the boxes are ebay sourced….Maybe these will add extra inspiration.
In the case of my sister in laws wedding, I made towers of large favour boxes as the table centres and the favours. They were filled with a bag of pink and white sweets.
These ones were for a friend who simply didn’t have the time left to do the tiny details.
She bought the boxes, sweets and purple inserts and I put them together for her.
A pretty, enjoyable and memorable day will always be possible without the big cost.